TWELFTH NIGHT BLOGTOPIA

Fri, 06 Jan 2006 17:52:25

Today is a blogger’s dream so this will be long. Pour yourself a cup of coffee if it’s morning or something stronger if it’s the nighttime, wah doo day. To paraphrase that wizard and true star Todd Rundgren, “City in my head, blogtopia…”

ITEM-1: IT’S CARNIVAL TIME- Today, Twelfth Night, is the official start of the Carnival season. The notion of a post-K Carnival has been controversial but those of us in Debrisville need the respite from rebuilding and regrouping. It’s also part of the fabric of our community, a fabric that was badly tattered by Katrina and its aftermath. We didn’t cancel Thanksgiving, Christmas or Chanukah did we? Canceling Carnival would be the same for New Orleanians.

The group that customarily kicks off Carnival is the Phunny Phorty Phellows. As my friend the Tulanian Scribe a lapsed PPPite likes to say “We’re like the Holy Roman Empire which was neither holy Roman nor an empire. We’re not all phunny phorty or phellows.”

The PPP will however be obliged to deviate from their customary routine of gathering at the Carrollton streetcar barn and riding up the avenue (St. Charles for the non-locals reading this) downtown. This year they will gather in front of the former Krauss Store on Canal Street for a shorter jaunt up Canal.

ITEM-2: DEMOLITION MEN ACT TWO- There’s been a ferocious pushback after Mayor C Ray and his Chief Clone did their blow stuff up kabuki dance yesterday. Demonstrations court orders you name it. Mind you some of these buildings *may* need to be bulldozed but people need to be informed. If they can have an orderly process in Da Parish (St. Bernard) then we city slickers can do likewise. Update: A judge has ordered a halt to demolitions pending a hearing on January 19.

ITEM-3: GOVERNOR MEEMAW LECTURES COLLEGE OF CLOWNS- Yesterday the Governor appeared before the City Council and urged them and Mayor C Ray to act like adults and settle the FEMA trailer site imbroglio. Governor Meemaw threatened to send them to bed without dessert and to ground them for two weeks. The Clowns responded by holding their breaths until their faces turned blue…

ITEM-4: ORLEANS PARISH ELECTION WATCH- We’re supposed to have elections on February 4th but Governor Meemaw and Secretary Of State Not Fox delayed them. The result was litigation litigation and litigation: 3 suits and counting. In response to one suit Not Fox moved the election date up to April 29th. That was not good enough for the federal plaintiffs and their lawyer (and my friend and neighbor) the Z-Man. The Z-Man quite correctly wants us to act like a democracy and give the people a say in picking their leaders. What a concept.

Another proposed slogan for the Mayor’s re-election campaign. This time on a billboard Re-Elect Nagin: I’ve Been On CNN & You Haven’t. Accompanying the text will be a picture of Mayor C Ray sticking his tongue out.

ITEM-5: YOU SAY BYZANTINE I SAY OTTOMAN- The Greek Orthodox Patriarch Bartholomew I  will bring his long white beard to New Orleans this weekend. Hey, I was raised Greek Orthodox so I have the right to joke about it or anything else for that matter. I believe the Easter Service from 1973 is still going on at my former church…

Anyway I’m posting about this NOT to mock the Patriarch himself I’m glad he’s coming to show his support for us post-K. Thanks Bart. No my target is the pompous president of the board of Holy Trinity Cathedral here in Debrisville. The Greek-American Prince was on the WWL-TV Morning News and kept referring to a certain city as Constantinople. Hello? It’s been Istanbul since the 15th Century. Wake up and smell the Turkish…I mean Greek coffee.

Even my *very* proud to be Greek late father though that it was Istanbullshit to call it Constantinople. (My father’s motto could have been: if it’s not Greek it’s crap.)

My favorite part of the interview was when the Greek-American Prince told anchor/local icon Sally Ann Roberts that the Pope would be going to Constantinople soon. I hope that Benedict’s travel agent knows he’s not going to Istanbul. As Ira Gershwin would surely say at this point “Let’s call the whole thing off.”

Irredentism like that of the Greek-American Prince is a big problem in today’s world which brings me to the next item.

ITEM-6: PAT THE PUTZ- Well there he goes again. Pat Robertson thinks that Israeli PM Ariel Sharon was struck down by the Big Guy for even contemplating making a partial peace with the Palestinians. He also said that the same thing happened to one of my heroes the late great PM Yitzhak Rabin. Damn Pat the Putz’s God is always pissed off at someone isn’t he/she/it? Oh I forgot that Pat the Putz’s God is butch and loves war. It makes me proud to be an agnostic.

Adrastos to the press: stop covering this pischer every time he says something incredibly idiotic. It’s the only way Pat the Putz gets any pub nowadays. Oy such a schmuck. Speaking of Chickenhawks who love war…

ITEM-7: WHITE HOUSE IRAQ DOG & PONY SHOW-  King George the W pretended to consult with 13 former Secretaries of State and Defense yesterday. Even heathen Democrats like Madeline Albright and Robert McNamara were invited. And McNamara knows something about quagmires. According to David Sanger of the NYT the “consultation” involved a 40 minute briefing 10 minutes of comments by the former luminaries and then a photo-op. After the snapshots were taken W and his krewe of clowns Rummy and Condi left the room. Message: W Listens….NOT.”

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