Sat, 28 Jan 2006 04:59:59
New Orleans investment banker Mike Hammer announced the other day that he’s running for Mayor. My first reaction to this announcement was: who the hell is he? My second reaction: Woo-hoo another politically inexperienced businessman wants to be our Mayor. It worked out so well with C Ray…
But my inner satirist/blogger finally kicked in and realized that this is a bonanza for the likes of me. Imagine a Mayor like Mickey Spillane’s hard boiled detective Mike Hammer. That Mike Hammer wouldn’t take any shit from posers and pansies like President Beavis or Katrina Kaiser Donald Powell. He’d smack them upside the head with a gat pour whiskey down their throats and make them do his bidding. Mike Hammer was always a very direct guy. Problems with Governor Meemaw? Well Mike had a way with the skirts; he’d charm her and convince her to speak in complete sentences (that would be a first) and to be a stand-up broad. Trouble with the College Of Clowns? Mike Hammer would lock them up in the council chambers and make them an offer they couldn’t refuse. Yeah I know that was Vito Corleone’s line but Mario Puzo and Mickey Spillane went to the same college of hard knocks.
So my advice for Debrisville’s Mike Hammer: get a fedora drink some bourbon forget all that goo-goo crapola and kick some ass. Remember:
This entry was published in purple because Mickey Spillane wrote purple prose. Got it? Good. “