Daily Archives: January 30, 2006

 Calling Bob Weir

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 20:30:58

Well, a few minutes after I blogged this morning Mrs. Moron drove off in the Moronmobile. They seem to be moving at a record pace for them: a mere 6 days instead of 13. When the first Moron watch ended I quoted Marty Balin this time it’s the Grateful Dead’s Bob Weir’s turn: I need a miracle everyday. And apparently I got one. It’s not exactly the immaculate conception but hey I’ll take it. I was beginning to think that “Touch Of Grey” would be more fitting but that’s a Garcia-Hunter song and Jerry’s hard to get ahold of these days alas. Perhaps the Morons planned to move  faster but were too busy reading Strindberg for their next coffee klatch with Harvard Boy. And Harvard Boy is a stern taskmaster…

Speaking of the Weir-Barlow tune “I Need A Miracle ” it was a catch phrase used by bedraggled Deadheads seeking tickets outside sold-out arenas man. Sometimes it worked too man. Ah the things I recall from my misspent youth man; frankly it’s amazing that I remember anything at all man. But there’s no truth to the rumor that I ever liked patchouli oil or played hacky-sack.  Of course patchouli oil does serve as an excellent hippie detector if detecting hippies is your thing. It’s not mine that’s a job for Guy Noir or Mike Hammer. Probably not Mike Hammer: he’d pour the patchouli oil down some poor hippies’ throat and shove incense sticks up their nose. I can’t have such a thing on my conscience.

IN LIKE SHINN

Mon, 30 Jan 2006 05:35:58

Well I owe Hornets Coach Byron Scott an apology of sorts. I thought he was talking out of turn when he said that his hoopsters should play “where the wind comes sweeping down the plain” next season and maybe longer. It turns out that he wasn’t freelancing but spouting the company line. His boss George (Kick Me In The) Shinn spouted the same line in a rather snarky encounter with the press after Saturday night’s whupping of the Memphis Grizzlies. (The NBA *really* needs to let teams change their nicknames more easily after they relocate. There were Grizzlies *near* Vancouver but who the hell ever heard of a Grizzly in Memphis with the possible exception of Issac Hayes. And don’t get me started about the Utah Jazz. They oughta be the Utah Polygamists.)

After being good at first while exiled “where the wild wheat sure smells sweet ” Shinn seems to be reverting to the form that made him the most unpopular person in Charlotte North Carolina. He’s lucky in one regard: there’s a long list of people competing to be the least popular person in Debrisville. I think Shinn is behind Archie Bunker Benson Brownie President Beavis Aaron Brooks Governor Meemaw and C Ray but he’s got a chance to move up (down?) the list.

Since the Hornets owner kicked us when we’re down I hereby administer a virtual kick in the Shinn. <whack>”