T is for Tacky: Tucks/Endymion Wusses Out

Sun, 26 Feb 2006 06:13:34

I prefer taking it easy on the Saturday before Mardi Gras. We only saw one parade and had limited company; one of whom did some weeding free of charge. Eh good deal.

Item-1 T is for Tacky: TucksTucks is the King of tat sophomoric humor and tacky throws. They throw plastic toilets that actually flush toilet paper and panties among other classy items. I believe they puchase their throws at Bloomingdale’s or Harrod’s…

Our friend Becky the Silent rides in Tucks and gave us some fur lined handcuffs before the parade. Oy such a throw. I don’t have a good picture of Becky on her float but on the left there’s a shot of two visiting whack jobs from storm ravaged Baton Rouge wearing knickers provided by the Beckstress. Then there are two snaps featuring  the Ducks Of Dixieland. The Ducks looked a bit skittish this year: there was a rumor that VP Duce might do some duck hunting along the parade route. Hey that makes as much sense as invading Iraq putting Brownie in charge of FEMA or turning our ports over to an anti-Semitic oil sheikhdom:

Item-2 Endymion Wusses Out-  Endymion’s Captain Ed Muniz is a Repub politician from suburban Kenner. Muniz displayed almost Bushlike “judgment” in prematurely pulling the plug on his parade. We had moderate to light rain not a deluge. And super krewes Orpheus and Bacchus have both paraded when it was pouring buckets. The year Billy Crystal was Bacchus he was one wet funnymensch.

The lamest excuse offered by Captain Ed was that he delayed the parade until tomorrow night because he didn’t want the Convention Center to get dirty. Since when did he turn into Felix Unger?

The real reason for the delay IMO is that Endymion loves to throw its weight around *and* Muniz being from Kenner doesn’t give a rat’s ass about New Orleans or our over-extended police force. Now we’re stuck with parades today from 11:30 AM to god only knows when Endymion will finish. Hopefully they’ll be back on their regular Mid-City parade route or even in Metry next year. Yo Captain Ed   keep your glitzy tacky parading ass out of Uptown in 2007. If you wanna make something of it I’ll send Mike Hammer to meetcha. He may be a fictional character but he’s a mensch unlike the wusses of Endymion.

I usually enjoy skipping Endymion but I plan to stay for the start so I can boo hiss and heckle. Besides Brother Martin is marching in Endymion so we’ll have another chance to embarrass the Kid…


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