Thu, 24 May 2007 18:02:08
It poured buckets or (fill in your favorite rainy day cliche) in the Quarter yesterday. For some reason the rain brings the weirdos out in droves or perhaps it just drives them under the balconies seeking shelter from the deluge. Two moments in particular tickled my funny bone wherever the hell that’s located:
- A large group of very wet and rather frantic Russian tourists entered the shop. A brassy and aggressive blond woman (no not Dangerblond she’s a Yank but not a Yankee) demanded that I sell them rain coats. We don’t sell soft goods plastic or anything remotely serviceable as rain gear. After deciding that they weren’t Russian mafia types who would curb stomp me Tony Soprano style I laughed and said: “I can’t sell what I don’t have.” She looked puzzled and somewhat irate but one of her peeps looked around and started laughing as well. I told them how to swim over to Walgreen’s. Slosh slosh.
- Some very tall joker dressed in a black suit sought shelter under the Upper Pontalba’s balcony during the downpour. I thought nothing of it until a customer informed me that he had a lizard on his nose. I looked for myself and sure enough it was a genuine bona fide live lizard. But by the time I saw him the lizard had crawled up his face and was resting comfortably on the top of his head. I resisted the temptation to ask the Lizard Man if he’d escaped from a side show…