Category Archives: Quarter Notes


Thu, 24 May 2007 18:02:08

It poured buckets or (fill in your favorite rainy day cliche) in the Quarter yesterday. For some reason the rain brings the weirdos out in droves or perhaps it just drives them under the balconies seeking shelter from the deluge. Two moments in particular tickled my funny bone wherever the hell that’s located:

  • A large group of very wet and rather frantic Russian tourists entered the shop. A brassy and aggressive blond woman (no not Dangerblond she’s a Yank but not a Yankee) demanded that I sell them rain coats. We don’t sell soft goods plastic or anything remotely serviceable as rain gear. After deciding that they weren’t Russian mafia types who would curb stomp me Tony Soprano style I laughed and said: “I can’t sell what I don’t have.” She looked puzzled and somewhat irate  but one of her peeps looked around and started laughing as well. I told them how to swim over to Walgreen’s. Slosh slosh.
  • Some very tall joker dressed in a black suit sought shelter under the Upper Pontalba’s balcony during the downpour. I thought nothing of it until a customer informed me that he had a lizard on his nose. I looked for myself and sure enough it was a genuine bona fide live lizard. But by the time I saw him the lizard had crawled up his face and was resting comfortably on the top of his head. I resisted the temptation to ask the Lizard Man if he’d escaped from a side show…


Quarter Notes: Adrastos Encounters John Breaux

Sun, 12 Mar 2006 06:00:00
I was slaving away at my part-time gig in the Quarter yesterday afternoon when something interesting happened. (Slaving is a wild overstatement but I’m a piker compared to Crazy Kim.) Former US Senator John Breaux and his wife Lois came into the shop. There was a black guy from the Ninth Ward there and he told the Senator he should run for Governor. Breaux gave a vague answer in Senatorese; now that he’s out of office you’d think he’d give it up either for lent or for good…

Anyway back to my semi-snappy patter with Mr. Breaux in playlet form:

A:  What a relief a politician who isn’t running for anything.

B:  That’s really unusual in New Orleans right now. Y’all have 23 candidates for Mayor…

A:  And at least 3 are certifiable.

B:  That number seems low to me.

I asked him if he was still speaking to Bob Odom (the Louisiana Agriculture Commissioner who wants to draft Breaux to run against Meemaw next year.)  Breaux laughed and then reverted to Senatorese: “He’s really something…”

Now that the Singin’ Lt. Governor is running for Mayor I could think of worse things for Louisiana than John Breaux running for Governor and putting the hurt on Meemaw and Piyush. It’s hard however to think of anything *worse* for Breaux.  He looks like he enjoys being out of office and is such a nice man that I wouldn’t wish trying to clean up the post-K mess on him. Leave it to Eager Beaver Piyush and Meemaw Senator. They deserve the stress and you don’t. But if you change your mind you da man…